A catalog of the stuff in my apartment
I lost a pair of prescription sunglasses when I was back home in Arkansas for Christmas. The last time I remember wearing them was when I paid a visit to my middle sister’s house. We went outside so she could show me a walking trail that her husband had recently cleared on their property, and […]
Paper money from the U.S. has such a distinctive smell I somehow know what it tastes like even though I have never, to my knowledge, had a dollar bill in my mouth. It’s an unmistakable odor combining mustiness, ink, and sweat. I’m sure the taste is salty and earthy yet also chemical. Is this grossing […]
Not long ago, I ran out of reading material during an out-of-town trip, so I dragged my husband, Frank, who was with me, inside the next bookstore we encountered. I asked him to pick out something for me, ‘cause I didn’t have access to my Books to Read lists and was therefore incapable of making […]
The most versatile thing in my home—aside from the sexual tastes of its inhabitants—is the kitchen stool I sometimes use as an end table, a TV dinner tray, a clothes drying rack, a stepladder, and even, on rare occasions, as a kitchen stool. The item dates to the year my husband, Frank, and I lived […]
When I look back on my experience as a moviegoer thus far in life, I feel like I’ve seen a bunch of films. But if that’s the case, then how come whenever a movie comes up in conversation, I haven’t seen it? Or, to put it another way, when exactly did everybody watch The Matrix, […]
The thing that honey tastes best on is a Martha Harp dinner roll—a fluffy, buttery delicacy sold in the bakery section of Harps grocery stores, a regional chain based in my hometown of Springdale, Arkansas. Martha was the wife of the onetime owner. They’ve both gone to that shopping cart corral in the sky by […]
I have recently come to the conclusion that turtlenecks suit me. Maybe that’s because I have a thin neck and the fabric supplies an illusion of bulk. Or maybe it’s that, when worn with my glasses and habitually severe expression, a turtleneck seems to complete what should perhaps be my signature look: a visual homage […]
The photo on the holiday card sent out this year by my husband, Frank, and me shows the pair of us at the ancient Greek theater in Taormina, Sicily, where we went in September. The image came out more grainy and low-res than we wanted. It looked better in the digital mock-up when we were […]
At this time of year, holiday music is like James Corden in 2019: ubiquitous and terrible. I don’t pretend my own taste in carols is superior to the norm, but I do know what my ears want to hear in December. My personal canon of Christmas albums would have to include the following 10 recordings. […]
When my husband, Frank, and I were in Vietnam in the spring for our annual Big Trip, the theme of the vacation seemed to be Hats ‘n’ Holes. We kept being led into tunnels and caves and such, and we kept donning various types of headgear, such as pith helmets in the caves (presumably to […]
Indirect Objects 